i can feel myself beginning to become more and more detached. normally this would creep me out but right now, it just feels right.
maybe what i need is to seriously go underground for christmas break and just take a break from the people i feel are causing too much turmoil in my life. we'll see.
December 12, 2010
December 2, 2010
November 28, 2010
LATE! Day 25.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
holden caulfield.
he's fascinating to me. he's immature and ridiculous and probably a huge douchebag who thinks he's really misunderstood. just when you write him off as just an angsty teen, he says something universally true and perfect. he says something off that it's taken in different context by different people and what another person thinks is bullshit might be a personal truth for you.
and he has a red plaid hunting hat and says things like "goddamn phonies". what's not to love?
holden caulfield.
he's fascinating to me. he's immature and ridiculous and probably a huge douchebag who thinks he's really misunderstood. just when you write him off as just an angsty teen, he says something universally true and perfect. he says something off that it's taken in different context by different people and what another person thinks is bullshit might be a personal truth for you.
and he has a red plaid hunting hat and says things like "goddamn phonies". what's not to love?
LATE! Day 23 and 24.
Day 23 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
the summer after i graduated high school. there was something really reassuring about graduating high school and waiting for fall so i could start a new phase. also, i really didn't have to do much to prepare for college in the sense of tests/books to read/etc. now i'm halfway through my sophomore year and i do not want to go into the real world :(
Day 24 - Something that makes you sad when you think about it.
i don't really think about sad things too often but sometimes, the td situation makes me sad. i feel bad about how we treated each other and how immature we both were. it ended fine though.
the summer after i graduated high school. there was something really reassuring about graduating high school and waiting for fall so i could start a new phase. also, i really didn't have to do much to prepare for college in the sense of tests/books to read/etc. now i'm halfway through my sophomore year and i do not want to go into the real world :(
Day 24 - Something that makes you sad when you think about it.
i don't really think about sad things too often but sometimes, the td situation makes me sad. i feel bad about how we treated each other and how immature we both were. it ended fine though.
November 27, 2010
again.
i keep writing posts but instead of actually posting them, i just save them in my drafts.
maybe i'll just get a tumblr hahahaha fml.
maybe i'll just get a tumblr hahahaha fml.
November 25, 2010
thanks.
i'm thankful for my life. it wouldn't be anything without my family or friends. especially lately, i've been appreciating all the little things in my day to day life that make it just a little better. these things are probably lame/dumb but i like lists.
1. gatorade.
2. sunflowers. i bought some yesterday.
3. greeting cards.
4. cee-lo songs.
5. excess of ham.
1. gatorade.
2. sunflowers. i bought some yesterday.
3. greeting cards.
4. cee-lo songs.
5. excess of ham.
November 24, 2010
Day 22.
- How have you changed in the past 2 years?
*some of these are really contradictory and i'm doing them to the soundtrack of "never forget you" by lupe fiasco ft. john legend hahaha.
i've become more open towards new people and new experiences. i've realized that there's no point in keeping people in my life i don't really like. also, there's no point in being around them when i don't want to be either. i might hate humanity a little bit more with each person i meet but i still have a lot of optimism towards people. i'm definitely more reckless than i was 2 years ago. i'm beginning to realize a lot of things about myself that completely deviate from who i was/thought i was 2 years ago.
*some of these are really contradictory and i'm doing them to the soundtrack of "never forget you" by lupe fiasco ft. john legend hahaha.
i've become more open towards new people and new experiences. i've realized that there's no point in keeping people in my life i don't really like. also, there's no point in being around them when i don't want to be either. i might hate humanity a little bit more with each person i meet but i still have a lot of optimism towards people. i'm definitely more reckless than i was 2 years ago. i'm beginning to realize a lot of things about myself that completely deviate from who i was/thought i was 2 years ago.
November 23, 2010
Day 21.
- Post a picture of yourself in your natural state.
i sit in my spinny chair and point at celine dion posters. i'm probably reading really disturbing facebook messages sent to me by my bestie. i'm usually eating fruit and drinking water. every half hour, i'll get up and dance to nicki minaj.
i sit in my spinny chair and point at celine dion posters. i'm probably reading really disturbing facebook messages sent to me by my bestie. i'm usually eating fruit and drinking water. every half hour, i'll get up and dance to nicki minaj.
November 22, 2010
Day 20.
- A drunken story.
one time on gayc's birthday, i thought i had devised a really clever method on how to take shots.
1. have some chaser. i like juice.
2. don't swallow the chaser! just hold it in your mouth.
3. take a shot.
4. immediately follow the shot with MORE chaser.
5. get overly shitfaced.
we went shot for shot. i won! with like 10 shots in about an hour? i thought my shot method was so cool. then, something about the motion of the car, too many shots and perhaps the taco bueno i ate beforehand caught up to me. also, seeing gayc puking on the side of the road didn't help. i threw up in the car. the car of my friend's boyfriend i had just met. we didn't make it to the club. we just stumbled back home! and i cleaned my hot mess self up. i laid on the couch and watched the food network until i fell asleep. the end.
*sidenote: i will probably continue doing this shot method. i don't learn from my mistakes :/
one time on gayc's birthday, i thought i had devised a really clever method on how to take shots.
1. have some chaser. i like juice.
2. don't swallow the chaser! just hold it in your mouth.
3. take a shot.
4. immediately follow the shot with MORE chaser.
5. get overly shitfaced.
we went shot for shot. i won! with like 10 shots in about an hour? i thought my shot method was so cool. then, something about the motion of the car, too many shots and perhaps the taco bueno i ate beforehand caught up to me. also, seeing gayc puking on the side of the road didn't help. i threw up in the car. the car of my friend's boyfriend i had just met. we didn't make it to the club. we just stumbled back home! and i cleaned my hot mess self up. i laid on the couch and watched the food network until i fell asleep. the end.
*sidenote: i will probably continue doing this shot method. i don't learn from my mistakes :/
November 21, 2010
yahooligans.
every single time i go to check my email, i get roped into reading those stupid articles on yahoo!
i just read one about soulmates. it was disparaging and i should probably start using a new email service.
i just read one about soulmates. it was disparaging and i should probably start using a new email service.
?
i don't understand guys. like, not in the slightest. somebody needs to write a book about this. actually, i'm sure there are books about this shit but i mean, i hate greg bernhardt so nevermind.
i'm just going to eat my chipotle burrito and watch the lakers game. maybe watching kobe take a basketball flavored dump on the warriors will lighten my mood.
i'm just going to eat my chipotle burrito and watch the lakers game. maybe watching kobe take a basketball flavored dump on the warriors will lighten my mood.
Day 19.
- Disrespecting your parents.
*i'm finally caught up on these numbered reflections! yeah, smd.
i guess i have a tendency to disrespect my parents a lot. ideally, they would like for me to be really studious and not have any remnants of a social life. it's really hard for me to just stay at home all the time especially for no reason other than the fact that it makes my parents happy to know i'm safe since i'm asleep on the couch, watching csi miami.
in regards to life decisions like my major or moving out, i go against their wishes for me all the time because if it came down to me choosing my own way vs. their way, i would choose mine every time. it's hard to have old school parents because they're so set in how things in vietnam worked that they think moving out of the house before i'm married and/or not becoming an engineer/doctor/IT person is ridiculous and dangerous.
i've been hoping a lot lately that my parents understand that i'm growing up and not that i love them any less or that i'm growing away from them. i just need space to work out who i am and what i want/need from life and doing so in the confines of my house is really hard.
*i'm finally caught up on these numbered reflections! yeah, smd.
i guess i have a tendency to disrespect my parents a lot. ideally, they would like for me to be really studious and not have any remnants of a social life. it's really hard for me to just stay at home all the time especially for no reason other than the fact that it makes my parents happy to know i'm safe since i'm asleep on the couch, watching csi miami.
in regards to life decisions like my major or moving out, i go against their wishes for me all the time because if it came down to me choosing my own way vs. their way, i would choose mine every time. it's hard to have old school parents because they're so set in how things in vietnam worked that they think moving out of the house before i'm married and/or not becoming an engineer/doctor/IT person is ridiculous and dangerous.
i've been hoping a lot lately that my parents understand that i'm growing up and not that i love them any less or that i'm growing away from them. i just need space to work out who i am and what i want/need from life and doing so in the confines of my house is really hard.
*this picture is exactly how i feel hahahah minus the hat and cleavage.
LATE! Day 17 and 18.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
highs:
1. getting into ut.
2. moving back home! and knowing i don't have to go back to unt.
3. meeting some really great people at uta.
4. the good things involving vsa.
5. slightly questionable halloween weekend.
6. changing my major to something i love.
7. KAYAKING.
8. roadtrippin'
9. remembering who i am and who i want to be after a weird year.
10. generally, my whole year has pretty much been a high.
lows:
1. 6th street intensity :/
2. forgetting myself.
3. drama.
4. losing the earrings i had just bought.
5. i don't remember any other lows. this list was pretty vague.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
like religion wise? i guess i'm generally buddhist but in moments of desperation, i pray to god. i'm not sure why that is, maybe it's just easier to say god than it is to say buddha.
but life wise, i think i just believe that mutual respect for others is necessary. i like kindness in people too. you don't have to be completely sweet and polite all the time to be considered kind. also, that's not really fun hahah. i believe empathy, respect and kindness goes a long way and we've forgotten that. i guess i believe in people with good hearts, even through all the bullshit and drama.
highs:
1. getting into ut.
2. moving back home! and knowing i don't have to go back to unt.
3. meeting some really great people at uta.
4. the good things involving vsa.
5. slightly questionable halloween weekend.
6. changing my major to something i love.
7. KAYAKING.
8. roadtrippin'
9. remembering who i am and who i want to be after a weird year.
10. generally, my whole year has pretty much been a high.
lows:
1. 6th street intensity :/
2. forgetting myself.
3. drama.
4. losing the earrings i had just bought.
5. i don't remember any other lows. this list was pretty vague.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
like religion wise? i guess i'm generally buddhist but in moments of desperation, i pray to god. i'm not sure why that is, maybe it's just easier to say god than it is to say buddha.
but life wise, i think i just believe that mutual respect for others is necessary. i like kindness in people too. you don't have to be completely sweet and polite all the time to be considered kind. also, that's not really fun hahah. i believe empathy, respect and kindness goes a long way and we've forgotten that. i guess i believe in people with good hearts, even through all the bullshit and drama.
November 20, 2010
November 19, 2010
LATE! Day 15 and 16.
i suck at routines, apparently.
Day 15 - Your favorite *tv show and what it’s about.
i changed it from movies to tv show because i don't think i even have a favorite movie. if i were trapped on an island, awaiting death by falling coconut/monsters from LOST, i would like to die watching 30 Rock. 30 Rock's pretty much about tina fey's life when she was working at SNL. she portrays liz lemon in the show, which is tina fey in disguise. i love every single character on the show and I WANT TO GO TO THERE.
Day 16 - Something on someone's facebook that makes you cringe.
"all the hipsters on campus roll out for this pro choice thing."
Day 15 - Your favorite *tv show and what it’s about.
i changed it from movies to tv show because i don't think i even have a favorite movie. if i were trapped on an island, awaiting death by falling coconut/monsters from LOST, i would like to die watching 30 Rock. 30 Rock's pretty much about tina fey's life when she was working at SNL. she portrays liz lemon in the show, which is tina fey in disguise. i love every single character on the show and I WANT TO GO TO THERE.
Day 16 - Something on someone's facebook that makes you cringe.
"all the hipsters on campus roll out for this pro choice thing."
November 17, 2010
LATE! Day 13 and 14.
Day 13 - 5 things that irritate you about the opposite sex.
1. public touching of the testicles.
2. how they don't really have to do much work when it comes to club dancing.
3. guys are extremely confusing. they don't think they're extremely confusing. this is irritating.
4. they leave the toilet seat up >8[
5. guys usually don't give listening signals! like nodding or agreeing statements. thanks, linguistics class.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
i have two memories from around the same time but i'm not sure which came first. hm!
my first memory is running around the backyard of my old house in california. there was this little pathway between our house and our neighbors (where i would pick loquats to my little heart's content) and it was pretty much a dirt path. i remember being really excited about preschool so i ran along this path to get my older cousins so they could come with me. i remember having an armful of loquat fruits and running really fast until i tripped on a giant ass rock and fell face first into another big ass rock. to this day, i still have a scar on my left eyebrow. i remember bleeding a lot and crying but i think i was crying over my now smushed loquats.
my second memory would be when i was like 5 and alan vu had just started standing. mostly, he would just stand in his crib all day. one day, i decided to swing on his crib and sing something about airplanes. tis also my earliest memory of bad singing and dancing. alan vu wasn't havin' none of dat. he started crying and i got really angry that he wouldn't sing with me. this shit still happens to this day hahahaha.
1. public touching of the testicles.
2. how they don't really have to do much work when it comes to club dancing.
3. guys are extremely confusing. they don't think they're extremely confusing. this is irritating.
4. they leave the toilet seat up >8[
5. guys usually don't give listening signals! like nodding or agreeing statements. thanks, linguistics class.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
i have two memories from around the same time but i'm not sure which came first. hm!
my first memory is running around the backyard of my old house in california. there was this little pathway between our house and our neighbors (where i would pick loquats to my little heart's content) and it was pretty much a dirt path. i remember being really excited about preschool so i ran along this path to get my older cousins so they could come with me. i remember having an armful of loquat fruits and running really fast until i tripped on a giant ass rock and fell face first into another big ass rock. to this day, i still have a scar on my left eyebrow. i remember bleeding a lot and crying but i think i was crying over my now smushed loquats.
my second memory would be when i was like 5 and alan vu had just started standing. mostly, he would just stand in his crib all day. one day, i decided to swing on his crib and sing something about airplanes. tis also my earliest memory of bad singing and dancing. alan vu wasn't havin' none of dat. he started crying and i got really angry that he wouldn't sing with me. this shit still happens to this day hahahaha.
November 16, 2010
daily.
maybe i'm not cut out to do that list on the daily :/
buttttt, today's been one of the most stressful days in a while. it's frustrating to not be able to get points or ideas or opinions across. i just get really red faced honestly.
but i get red faced like 80% of the time! >8[
buttttt, today's been one of the most stressful days in a while. it's frustrating to not be able to get points or ideas or opinions across. i just get really red faced honestly.
but i get red faced like 80% of the time! >8[
November 15, 2010
LATE! Day 11 and Day 12.
i really wanted to be able to keep up with this but here goesssss.
Day 11: - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up. *sidenote- my ipod is really intense. i combined 3 different ipods so now i have random music everywhere. also, viet jams for my ma. this is going to be slightly embarrassing.
1. should i stay or should i go - the sex pistols.
2. show me yo bootyhole - saosin [HAHAHHA].
3. LDN - lily allen.
4. time to pretend - MGMT.
5. apologize remix - onerepublic.
6. stereo - john legend.
7. who is mike jones? - mike jones.
8. do you know - enrique iglesias.
9. hypnotized - notorious b.i.g.
10. october song - amy winehouse.
that wasn't too bad. minus exposing my love of show me yo bootyhole by saosin :/
Day 12: - Bullet your whole day.
9:00 am - woke up and checked my phone. rolled over.
9:30 am - grumbled then my phone rang. lady gaga ringtonez everywhere.
10:00 am - proceeded to the kitchen where i talked to my dad. he told me i had to go
buy soup.
10:05 am - remembered i'm gross. proceeded to the bathroom; showered/brushed my
teefz/etc.
11:00 am - texting ensues. grumble about my paintball welts and need for soup.
12:00 pm - talked on the phone?
1:00 pm - ate chicken and mushroom soup.
1:25 pm - felt ill from homemade chicken and mushroom soup. got mocked by father.
2:00 pm - facebooked my life away. still on the phone?
3:00 pm - forced a friend to accompany me to walmart/kroger/chipotle/boba.
3:01 pm to 8:30 pm - ate a burrito baby, HAD THE BEST BOBA EVER, got bullied for my
boba, bought approx. 30 cans of soup, got called out for buying
30 cans of soup, roamed around walmart trying to buy bday cards.
9:00 pm - attempted to learn how to dance. collapsed in fits of LOL and heard my
creaky joints.
10:00 pm - goodbye to friend! proceeded to eat the rest of my burrito while watching
bones.
10:05 pm - got really grossed out by bones. reconsidered finishing the burrito.
10:20 pm - finished the burrito.
10:30 pm - watched murder mysteries! fell asleep in the living room per usual.
then i woke up at 3 am and stumbled to brush my teefs. then i stumbled back into my bed. PRODUCTIVE DAY FTW!
November 14, 2010
respect.
i really don't understand this lack of mutual respect. it's basic human decency to at least try to respect someone and factor them in at some level, however obscure.
all this unnecessary bullshit really serves no purpose but to piss people off and drive everyone apart. i'm trying really hard to not let it bother me and to let people do what they want, but when (if ever) will people start to see that their choices and actions affect everyone around them?
all this unnecessary bullshit really serves no purpose but to piss people off and drive everyone apart. i'm trying really hard to not let it bother me and to let people do what they want, but when (if ever) will people start to see that their choices and actions affect everyone around them?
November 12, 2010
Day 10
- Discuss your first love and first kiss.
i wouldn't say i've actually ever been in love and i have never actually kissed anyone so day 10 fucking sucks. hella irrelevant!
back in 7th/8th grade, i thought i was in love. maybe it was love for that age. i'm beginning to classify love by ages which is strange. you know, at the age of 13/14/15 or however old i was, you think that everything is love. reflecting back on it, it definitely was not love compared to what i think love is now. also, the fact that it was unrequited 7th/8th grade love makes it that much more irrational.
i thought at one point senior year that our 'relationship' could've eventually turned into love? but i was always really careful around that word. i still am now.
on to the topic of my first kiss, that shit hasn't happened yet. i realize that i'm 19! but surrusly, i feel like that situation hasn't really presented itself. also, part of me doesn't want to just randomly do that and feel like just another random girl on a list of random makeouts. maybe i'm taking this shit too seriously hahaha.
i wouldn't say i've actually ever been in love and i have never actually kissed anyone so day 10 fucking sucks. hella irrelevant!
back in 7th/8th grade, i thought i was in love. maybe it was love for that age. i'm beginning to classify love by ages which is strange. you know, at the age of 13/14/15 or however old i was, you think that everything is love. reflecting back on it, it definitely was not love compared to what i think love is now. also, the fact that it was unrequited 7th/8th grade love makes it that much more irrational.
i thought at one point senior year that our 'relationship' could've eventually turned into love? but i was always really careful around that word. i still am now.
on to the topic of my first kiss, that shit hasn't happened yet. i realize that i'm 19! but surrusly, i feel like that situation hasn't really presented itself. also, part of me doesn't want to just randomly do that and feel like just another random girl on a list of random makeouts. maybe i'm taking this shit too seriously hahaha.
November 11, 2010
Day 09
- How you hope your future will be like.
i feel like i talk about my future and its possibilities all the time on this blog! hahaha.
1. i want to LOVE my career, even if i'm not making any money at all. i'll just mooch off nidhi reddy for the rest of my days.
2. i hope my love life will be better! cause shit is tragic right now.
3. i hope i get to travel to really ballin places like the galapagos islands where i shall fulfill my childhood dream of riding on a big ass turtle.
4. i hope for my future to still be filled with loved ones.
5. i would say that i hope my life would be happy but that's really my own thing, isn't it? i can do that shit on my own really.
6. this isn't exactly the super distant future but next fall, i hope to be living in my own apartment.
*edit
OOOH AND I WANT A PUG! I WANT A PUG MORE THAN ANYTHINGGGGGG.
i've wanted a pug since like 10th grade when i fell in love with winston the pug! but he got adopted before i could convince my parents he wouldn't poop all over our asian carpet and chew our asian shoes. look at that precious little old man faceeeeee! i think i fell in love with pugs when i found out that they watch tv all the time and have stout legs and breathing problems. just like me.
i feel like i talk about my future and its possibilities all the time on this blog! hahaha.
1. i want to LOVE my career, even if i'm not making any money at all. i'll just mooch off nidhi reddy for the rest of my days.
2. i hope my love life will be better! cause shit is tragic right now.
3. i hope i get to travel to really ballin places like the galapagos islands where i shall fulfill my childhood dream of riding on a big ass turtle.
4. i hope for my future to still be filled with loved ones.
5. i would say that i hope my life would be happy but that's really my own thing, isn't it? i can do that shit on my own really.
6. this isn't exactly the super distant future but next fall, i hope to be living in my own apartment.
*edit
OOOH AND I WANT A PUG! I WANT A PUG MORE THAN ANYTHINGGGGGG.
i've wanted a pug since like 10th grade when i fell in love with winston the pug! but he got adopted before i could convince my parents he wouldn't poop all over our asian carpet and chew our asian shoes. look at that precious little old man faceeeeee! i think i fell in love with pugs when i found out that they watch tv all the time and have stout legs and breathing problems. just like me.
November 10, 2010
Day 08
- Your ideal date.
KAYAKING. we would go kayaking or something equally ballin. actually, as long as i'm with somebody i like coupled with a large amount of food and really great/ridiculous conversation about anything, it's pretty much the ideal date.
KAYAKING. we would go kayaking or something equally ballin. actually, as long as i'm with somebody i like coupled with a large amount of food and really great/ridiculous conversation about anything, it's pretty much the ideal date.
November 9, 2010
Day 07
- Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
i'm a complete astrology junkie. as previously stated, i went to astrology camp when i was a kid and i get daily horoscopes sent to my phone. i was born on a capricorn/aquarius cusp so i'm apparently stuck between two signs.
"capricorn/aquarius cusps are known to be disciplined, patient, loyal, traditional, ambitious, offbeat, progressive, cautious, practical, friendly, realistic, curious, stable, funny, confident, unique, attractive, competitive and multi-talented. They may also be rebellious, narrow-minded, cold, harsh, depressed, stubborn, secretive, aloof and over-critical."
of course i like the positive traits hahaha. the negative traits are surprisingly accurate too. then again, these are very general terms that can be twisted to fit any situation.
i'm a complete astrology junkie. as previously stated, i went to astrology camp when i was a kid and i get daily horoscopes sent to my phone. i was born on a capricorn/aquarius cusp so i'm apparently stuck between two signs.
"capricorn/aquarius cusps are known to be disciplined, patient, loyal, traditional, ambitious, offbeat, progressive, cautious, practical, friendly, realistic, curious, stable, funny, confident, unique, attractive, competitive and multi-talented. They may also be rebellious, narrow-minded, cold, harsh, depressed, stubborn, secretive, aloof and over-critical."
of course i like the positive traits hahaha. the negative traits are surprisingly accurate too. then again, these are very general terms that can be twisted to fit any situation.
November 8, 2010
Day 06
- Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
1. RIGHT NOW? i'm sitting in bed with my laptop, drinking coke with salt and eating a big ass pomegranate i bought for a dollar at kroger. i'm listening to taylor swift and this is apparently how i relax.
2. i cuss all the time. i blame it on an early exposure to eminem and really intense games of handball in the 4th grade.
3. a lot of people think they know me really well but it's not true. sometimes i keep friendships on a superficial level without really meaning to. i don't have many people i can truly call close friends.
4. i worry all the time about everything. i'll worry about you and things in your life too.
5. i have a tendency to dance and sing all the time. i don't do either well but i do them anyways. ESPECIALLY CAR DANCING. I LOOOOOOOVE CAR DANCING.
6. i have an annoying habit of setting my phone alarm an extra hour before i really want to wake up just so i can feel like i got more sleep. for example, i'll set my alarm for 5 am when i really want to wake up at 6 am! then when it goes off at 5 am, i'll mumble something about more sleep and reset my alarm for 6 am. i'm fucking annoying hahaha.
7. i've been a lakers fan since i was a kid. more than anything, i like that they remind me of when we used to have giant family parties on game day. i miss that.
8. nothing will ever be more important to me than my family.
9. the first song i ever drove to was nothing but a good time by poison. my friends were embarrassed for me but i love that song. maybe i'll start wearing a bandana like bret michaels!
10. secretly, i fear i might be into that romantic shit.
11. i'm more optimistic than people give me credit for.
12. if something fun comes up and it clashes with my responsibilities (i.e. work, studying, lesser fun things), i will find a way to get out of my responsibilities. i need to grow up hahaha.
13. my competitive streak is terrifying. i can't be sure of it but i think a vein pops out of my forehead, my muscles start to bulge and i turn green.
14. i'm straightforward because i'm too lazy to play games.
15. the biggest risk i ever took was changing my major from business/economics to anthropology/women's studies. i will probably make no money whatsoever as an anthro major but i'm happy. my parents, on the other hand, suspect that i completely made this major up :/
16. it takes a lot for me to like somebody. when i do like someone, i get really nervous around them and constantly second guess the things i say. then i'll probably awkwardly dance away.
17. i hate sushi. i've only tried it once but how the fuck are raw fish and cream cheese supposed to go together well? is that a grammatically correct sentence? hm. i guess i'm down to try it again.
18. speaking of, i question my grammar all the time. i'm a grammar bully. also, someone once told me i speak "valley girl english". that's when i realized i might have a californian accent.
19. i have a long standing love affair with sex and the city. i can probably recite every line from every episode. SMD! i can do the same for harry potter books.
20. i only have like three dance moves. i'm either raising the roof with one hand, fist pumping or executing shitty attempts at generic club grinding.
21. i'm probably a hypocrite. i'll let you know if i think the shit you do is stupid but i'll try not to judge YOU on the basis of your actions. i'm still trying to figure this one out.
22. i swing my arms a lot when i walk. i think i'm subconsciously trying to take up as much space as possible to make up for my height hahaha.
23. sometimes i get into really downer moods. these can easily be lifted with dancey songs and offerings of fruit.
24. one of my biggest fears in the world is the possibility of forgetting the most important moments in my life. that's why i take so many pictures and i guess that's a reason why i have this blog, so i can remember exactly how i felt or what i was thinking of at that exact moment.
25. i'm undecided on chivalry. it seems to put women on helpless pedestals while putting men in heroic positions. i like gender equality in everything and this has often put me at odds with some guys. for some reason, offering to either pay on a date or at least split the check are verbal equivalents of castration.
26. i have jello knees. sometimes my right kneecap will pop out and i'll crumple. usually this is only after strenuous dancing around my room to nicki minaj :/
27. i went to astrology camp when i was a kid and i still believe in it, at least to some extent.
28. i like flowers a lot. roses remind me of my childhood when i would roam around my aunt's garden, eating big ass guavas and cutting roses for the house. sunflowers just make me happy. tulips remind me of this dirty wale song about two lips. i've never been given flowers before. HINT.
29. every single drama that has entered my life since 9th grade has been discussed about over coffee with megan. i don't see her often as i'd like but when i do, it's like nothing has changed and we're still the same lame ass 9th graders.
30. i love conversations about anything. i just love talking.
omg this shit took me forever!
1. RIGHT NOW? i'm sitting in bed with my laptop, drinking coke with salt and eating a big ass pomegranate i bought for a dollar at kroger. i'm listening to taylor swift and this is apparently how i relax.
2. i cuss all the time. i blame it on an early exposure to eminem and really intense games of handball in the 4th grade.
3. a lot of people think they know me really well but it's not true. sometimes i keep friendships on a superficial level without really meaning to. i don't have many people i can truly call close friends.
4. i worry all the time about everything. i'll worry about you and things in your life too.
5. i have a tendency to dance and sing all the time. i don't do either well but i do them anyways. ESPECIALLY CAR DANCING. I LOOOOOOOVE CAR DANCING.
6. i have an annoying habit of setting my phone alarm an extra hour before i really want to wake up just so i can feel like i got more sleep. for example, i'll set my alarm for 5 am when i really want to wake up at 6 am! then when it goes off at 5 am, i'll mumble something about more sleep and reset my alarm for 6 am. i'm fucking annoying hahaha.
7. i've been a lakers fan since i was a kid. more than anything, i like that they remind me of when we used to have giant family parties on game day. i miss that.
8. nothing will ever be more important to me than my family.
9. the first song i ever drove to was nothing but a good time by poison. my friends were embarrassed for me but i love that song. maybe i'll start wearing a bandana like bret michaels!
10. secretly, i fear i might be into that romantic shit.
11. i'm more optimistic than people give me credit for.
12. if something fun comes up and it clashes with my responsibilities (i.e. work, studying, lesser fun things), i will find a way to get out of my responsibilities. i need to grow up hahaha.
13. my competitive streak is terrifying. i can't be sure of it but i think a vein pops out of my forehead, my muscles start to bulge and i turn green.
14. i'm straightforward because i'm too lazy to play games.
15. the biggest risk i ever took was changing my major from business/economics to anthropology/women's studies. i will probably make no money whatsoever as an anthro major but i'm happy. my parents, on the other hand, suspect that i completely made this major up :/
16. it takes a lot for me to like somebody. when i do like someone, i get really nervous around them and constantly second guess the things i say. then i'll probably awkwardly dance away.
17. i hate sushi. i've only tried it once but how the fuck are raw fish and cream cheese supposed to go together well? is that a grammatically correct sentence? hm. i guess i'm down to try it again.
18. speaking of, i question my grammar all the time. i'm a grammar bully. also, someone once told me i speak "valley girl english". that's when i realized i might have a californian accent.
19. i have a long standing love affair with sex and the city. i can probably recite every line from every episode. SMD! i can do the same for harry potter books.
20. i only have like three dance moves. i'm either raising the roof with one hand, fist pumping or executing shitty attempts at generic club grinding.
21. i'm probably a hypocrite. i'll let you know if i think the shit you do is stupid but i'll try not to judge YOU on the basis of your actions. i'm still trying to figure this one out.
22. i swing my arms a lot when i walk. i think i'm subconsciously trying to take up as much space as possible to make up for my height hahaha.
23. sometimes i get into really downer moods. these can easily be lifted with dancey songs and offerings of fruit.
24. one of my biggest fears in the world is the possibility of forgetting the most important moments in my life. that's why i take so many pictures and i guess that's a reason why i have this blog, so i can remember exactly how i felt or what i was thinking of at that exact moment.
25. i'm undecided on chivalry. it seems to put women on helpless pedestals while putting men in heroic positions. i like gender equality in everything and this has often put me at odds with some guys. for some reason, offering to either pay on a date or at least split the check are verbal equivalents of castration.
26. i have jello knees. sometimes my right kneecap will pop out and i'll crumple. usually this is only after strenuous dancing around my room to nicki minaj :/
27. i went to astrology camp when i was a kid and i still believe in it, at least to some extent.
28. i like flowers a lot. roses remind me of my childhood when i would roam around my aunt's garden, eating big ass guavas and cutting roses for the house. sunflowers just make me happy. tulips remind me of this dirty wale song about two lips. i've never been given flowers before. HINT.
29. every single drama that has entered my life since 9th grade has been discussed about over coffee with megan. i don't see her often as i'd like but when i do, it's like nothing has changed and we're still the same lame ass 9th graders.
30. i love conversations about anything. i just love talking.
omg this shit took me forever!
November 7, 2010
the fate.
i've been thinking a lot about fate and coincidence lately. i blame it on romantic comedies! but mostly (500) days of summer.
i've always been a really big believer in fate and the idea that everything does happen for a reason, despite how obscured the reasoning behind actions might be at any given moment. in daily life where it seems that every choice we make is completely up to us, the idea that those choices that we thought could have changed entire outcomes were really just part of an already mapped out life is crazy. it's interesting.
every single day, i surround myself with 'what if' situations. the end. i don't feel like writing anymore.
i've always been a really big believer in fate and the idea that everything does happen for a reason, despite how obscured the reasoning behind actions might be at any given moment. in daily life where it seems that every choice we make is completely up to us, the idea that those choices that we thought could have changed entire outcomes were really just part of an already mapped out life is crazy. it's interesting.
every single day, i surround myself with 'what if' situations. the end. i don't feel like writing anymore.
movies.
i feel like i only watch like 5 movies over and over again. i should expand my horizons past the point of romantic comedies :/
but who can resist penelope?!
Day 05
- A time you thought about ending your own life.
honestly, i've never seriously thought about ending my life in that way. "that way" being committing suicide. of course i've had those angst filled teen moments where i'd wallow in self pity and think about how sorry everyone would be if i was gone. those moments were over (reflectively) insignificant things and they were fleeting.
however, i've thought about leaving my life behind and taking on a whole new identity before. obviously, this new identity would be thrilling and exciting in ways that my real life is not. this new identity always involved scenic moments in other countries (italy, france, australia) and always with a hot piece of ass by my side. the TD fiasco made me want to run away more than anything.
but the TD fiasco, like any angst filled moment i have, was fleeting. so is my desire to run away to a far off land and assume a new identity. what's so great about a new identity anyways? i like being chi vu even though my name is often mispronounced. i like my family and my friends. i like making shitty puns on my name. what was this post supposed to be about?
honestly, i've never seriously thought about ending my life in that way. "that way" being committing suicide. of course i've had those angst filled teen moments where i'd wallow in self pity and think about how sorry everyone would be if i was gone. those moments were over (reflectively) insignificant things and they were fleeting.
however, i've thought about leaving my life behind and taking on a whole new identity before. obviously, this new identity would be thrilling and exciting in ways that my real life is not. this new identity always involved scenic moments in other countries (italy, france, australia) and always with a hot piece of ass by my side. the TD fiasco made me want to run away more than anything.
but the TD fiasco, like any angst filled moment i have, was fleeting. so is my desire to run away to a far off land and assume a new identity. what's so great about a new identity anyways? i like being chi vu even though my name is often mispronounced. i like my family and my friends. i like making shitty puns on my name. what was this post supposed to be about?
how fitting.
November 6, 2010
Day 04
- Your views on religion.
i'm usually confused by organized religion. i question it a lot but never really bother to learn about it, honestly.
personally, i like to consider myself buddhist and it makes me sad when people are surprised to hear this but i can't blame them. i think religion or faith in anything is completely dependent on the person.
my personal philosophy is that i like to stay optimistic and i like to treat people with respect. i try not to judge someone's character based on very superficial actions. i try to stay away from people i dislike and be with the people i do like. i like to keep things as straightforward as possible.
*i cuss all the time. i lovingly call people bitch all the time. i'm a hypocrite because while i do judge peoples actions, i try not to categorize their character based on how many people they've made out with or how hard they party. despite trying to stay optimistic, i do get sad. i'm obviously not a robot, as much as i'd like to be. i just try to internalize it until i can shift it off on my friends ha! suckers.
i'm usually confused by organized religion. i question it a lot but never really bother to learn about it, honestly.
personally, i like to consider myself buddhist and it makes me sad when people are surprised to hear this but i can't blame them. i think religion or faith in anything is completely dependent on the person.
my personal philosophy is that i like to stay optimistic and i like to treat people with respect. i try not to judge someone's character based on very superficial actions. i try to stay away from people i dislike and be with the people i do like. i like to keep things as straightforward as possible.
*i cuss all the time. i lovingly call people bitch all the time. i'm a hypocrite because while i do judge peoples actions, i try not to categorize their character based on how many people they've made out with or how hard they party. despite trying to stay optimistic, i do get sad. i'm obviously not a robot, as much as i'd like to be. i just try to internalize it until i can shift it off on my friends ha! suckers.
November 5, 2010
chutzpah.
"Chutzpah is the quality of audacity, for good or for bad."
i don't believe in sitting back. not anymore.
if i learned anything from td, it's that chances are worth taking and that it's better to know than to be stuck wondering "what if" forever.
[edit]
aaaaaand FUCK YOU, GREG BERNHARDT.
i don't believe in sitting back. not anymore.
if i learned anything from td, it's that chances are worth taking and that it's better to know than to be stuck wondering "what if" forever.
[edit]
aaaaaand FUCK YOU, GREG BERNHARDT.
Day 03
- Your views on drugs and alcohol.
drugs: personally, i don't do them. if somebody feels like smoking weed, that's fine. it's just not my thing. everything other than weed, i dislike them for anyone. my uncle died from an overdose when i was in 8th grade and just seeing how it broke my mom was more than enough to kill any curiosity i'd ever have towards drugs. i've never really told anyone this but then again, why would i?
alcohol: obviously, i don't like the taste of it. however, i do like the action of taking shots. i tend to not drink often since i turn bright red and my body overheats. also, i look terrifying. all i want to do when i drink is go swimming or sleep honestly. SO HOT.
drugs: personally, i don't do them. if somebody feels like smoking weed, that's fine. it's just not my thing. everything other than weed, i dislike them for anyone. my uncle died from an overdose when i was in 8th grade and just seeing how it broke my mom was more than enough to kill any curiosity i'd ever have towards drugs. i've never really told anyone this but then again, why would i?
alcohol: obviously, i don't like the taste of it. however, i do like the action of taking shots. i tend to not drink often since i turn bright red and my body overheats. also, i look terrifying. all i want to do when i drink is go swimming or sleep honestly. SO HOT.
November 4, 2010
Day 02
- Where you’d like to be in ten years.
in ten years, i'll be 29 which is really just 30 in disguise. i've only thought about my future in blurbs of "well, i'd want to do this" but i've never really thought about the details.
i hate admitting this but i always assumed i'd be married before 30. maybe i'll be married in ten years. maybe i'll be done with my phd in cultural anthropology and teaching at a university somewhere. maybe i'll be living in some distant country where i can pick my own fruit.
- in ten years, i want to be able to say that i've traveled and not just to florida or california, etc.
-in ten years, i want to reflect back on who i am now and see that i've changed for the better.
- in ten years, i want to have been in at least one serious relationship.
-in ten years, i want to have the most important people in my life right now to stay constant.
-in ten years, i want to have achieved my goals, whatever they may be at that point.
- in ten years, i want to be shitfaced since i'm THAT CLOSE to being 30.
in ten years, i'll be 29 which is really just 30 in disguise. i've only thought about my future in blurbs of "well, i'd want to do this" but i've never really thought about the details.
i hate admitting this but i always assumed i'd be married before 30. maybe i'll be married in ten years. maybe i'll be done with my phd in cultural anthropology and teaching at a university somewhere. maybe i'll be living in some distant country where i can pick my own fruit.
- in ten years, i want to be able to say that i've traveled and not just to florida or california, etc.
-in ten years, i want to reflect back on who i am now and see that i've changed for the better.
- in ten years, i want to have been in at least one serious relationship.
-in ten years, i want to have the most important people in my life right now to stay constant.
-in ten years, i want to have achieved my goals, whatever they may be at that point.
- in ten years, i want to be shitfaced since i'm THAT CLOSE to being 30.
November 3, 2010
future flavored.
i'm not sure why i keep posting shit today! i guess i have a lot on my mind and none of it really jives into the same blog post.
today, as i headed back to arlington (where i spend most of my waking hours) with my mom to go grocery shopping, she asked me what i'm planning to do after college. granted, i've been asked this question a million times from both parents and with the same exact tone of unease in their voices. this time, it felt different but don't ask me why.
almost a week ago, i got asked the very same question by fur face boy over pluckers. it was kind of like a tablewide "interview" where he asked us about our dreams/goals/etc. as he got closer to me and i said the same thing i've been saying all semester; "anthropology major, minoring in women's studies" and to the same reaction, he asked me if that's what i dreamt of doing when i was a kid. no, i said, i wanted to be a marine biologist. when he asked me why i forgot about this, i said it was because i grew up and out of it.
however, what i meant was that i grew up and experienced it to a degree and didn't love it as much. anyways, i guess the point of this post is more to write to myself and reinforce my beliefs to myself. there's something to learning about different cultures and customs that makes me happy and i can't quite put my finger on it. i feel as if this is the right track for me but sometimes it's hard to put your reason for loving something into words.
i'm just glad i'm finally doing this for me.
today, as i headed back to arlington (where i spend most of my waking hours) with my mom to go grocery shopping, she asked me what i'm planning to do after college. granted, i've been asked this question a million times from both parents and with the same exact tone of unease in their voices. this time, it felt different but don't ask me why.
almost a week ago, i got asked the very same question by fur face boy over pluckers. it was kind of like a tablewide "interview" where he asked us about our dreams/goals/etc. as he got closer to me and i said the same thing i've been saying all semester; "anthropology major, minoring in women's studies" and to the same reaction, he asked me if that's what i dreamt of doing when i was a kid. no, i said, i wanted to be a marine biologist. when he asked me why i forgot about this, i said it was because i grew up and out of it.
however, what i meant was that i grew up and experienced it to a degree and didn't love it as much. anyways, i guess the point of this post is more to write to myself and reinforce my beliefs to myself. there's something to learning about different cultures and customs that makes me happy and i can't quite put my finger on it. i feel as if this is the right track for me but sometimes it's hard to put your reason for loving something into words.
i'm just glad i'm finally doing this for me.
everybody.
“Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.”
reading catcher in the rye again.
reading catcher in the rye again.
Day 01
- Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
there is no current relationship as i am habitually single. i think i've been in a relationship for a total of like a week and even that doesn't count. i was out at lunch with some vsa kidz a few days ago and the topic of relationships/boyfriends came up. during the course of this talk, it was said that "chi doesn't have time for a boyfriend" in response to why i don't have one. while i didn't find this offensive at all, i began to wonder if this is how people view me hahaha.
so i said something along the lines of "it's not that i don't have time, it's just that there isn't anyone" which i immediately regretted as soon as it verbal diarrhea-ed out of my mouth. but it's true, i'm of the mindset that if there was someone i'd want to be with, i'd make time for them.
i'm actually really used to single life because i'm not sure i know anything different. sometimes it kind of sucks but i'd rather feel eh sometimes about single status than WTF i hate this boy and stuck in a shitty relationship.
in conclusion, if i were to meet someone i liked and the idea of a relationship came up, i wouldn't say no. when/if it happens, it won't just be anyone simply for the purpose of being with someone though. LONGEST POST EVER SORRY. no one reads my blog anyways hahaha.
there is no current relationship as i am habitually single. i think i've been in a relationship for a total of like a week and even that doesn't count. i was out at lunch with some vsa kidz a few days ago and the topic of relationships/boyfriends came up. during the course of this talk, it was said that "chi doesn't have time for a boyfriend" in response to why i don't have one. while i didn't find this offensive at all, i began to wonder if this is how people view me hahaha.
so i said something along the lines of "it's not that i don't have time, it's just that there isn't anyone" which i immediately regretted as soon as it verbal diarrhea-ed out of my mouth. but it's true, i'm of the mindset that if there was someone i'd want to be with, i'd make time for them.
i'm actually really used to single life because i'm not sure i know anything different. sometimes it kind of sucks but i'd rather feel eh sometimes about single status than WTF i hate this boy and stuck in a shitty relationship.
in conclusion, if i were to meet someone i liked and the idea of a relationship came up, i wouldn't say no. when/if it happens, it won't just be anyone simply for the purpose of being with someone though. LONGEST POST EVER SORRY. no one reads my blog anyways hahaha.
November 2, 2010
complicated.
it's complicated but probably only from my own standpoint. i don't know when this tendency developed or why, but it needs to suck a cu.
this constant feeling of inadequacy in regards to certain aspects of my life needs to go away. i need to go away. in a non morbid fashion, of course.
maybe i just need a vacation. maybe i need some food. maybe i just need something new in my life that isn't so unpredictable.
i'll do this.
Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 04 - Your views on religion.
Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.
Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 08 - Your ideal date.
Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.
Day 13 - 5 things that irritate you about the opposite sex.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
Day 15 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Day 16 - Something on someone's facebook that makes you cringe.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20 - A drunken story.
Day 21 - Post a picture of yourself in your natural state.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Day 23 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
Day 24 - Something that makes you sad when you think about it.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27 - A problem that you have had.
Day 28 - Something that you miss.
Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month.
this constant feeling of inadequacy in regards to certain aspects of my life needs to go away. i need to go away. in a non morbid fashion, of course.
maybe i just need a vacation. maybe i need some food. maybe i just need something new in my life that isn't so unpredictable.
i'll do this.
Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 04 - Your views on religion.
Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.
Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 08 - Your ideal date.
Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.
Day 13 - 5 things that irritate you about the opposite sex.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
Day 15 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Day 16 - Something on someone's facebook that makes you cringe.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20 - A drunken story.
Day 21 - Post a picture of yourself in your natural state.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Day 23 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
Day 24 - Something that makes you sad when you think about it.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27 - A problem that you have had.
Day 28 - Something that you miss.
Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month.
October 31, 2010
ass.
i keep seeing this damn picture everywhere! and i'm mesmerized, obviously. also, i kind of want to throw up hahaha. it's been such a fun halloween weekend.
October 27, 2010
October 23, 2010
sometimes.
sometimes i'll be doing something at school (walking around campus listening to bad music, stalking people for parking spots or subtly dancing at work) and i think of things to write about in my blog. this blog.
but weirdly, i rarely get around to talking about what i want to talk about. i miss the obscurity of my xanga and it's my fault, really. i guess i'll push you back into obscurity, blog! so i can start to write about things on a personal level, however stupid and innane they may be.
i'll do it later.
but weirdly, i rarely get around to talking about what i want to talk about. i miss the obscurity of my xanga and it's my fault, really. i guess i'll push you back into obscurity, blog! so i can start to write about things on a personal level, however stupid and innane they may be.
i'll do it later.
October 18, 2010
it gets better.
it will get better, in reference to the recent wave of suicides in the LGBT community. there's this amazing project [http://www.youtube.com/user/itgetsbetterproject] where people can upload their stories and words of encouragement.
though i'm not gay, it doesn't matter because injustice hits all of us equally. throughout my 19 years, i've been so lucky to have amazing friends and family and yes, some of the closest people to me identify as homosexual. i love them just the same because to me, they're no different. it doesn't matter who you're attracted to or how "different" you might act because at the core, we're people and people deserve respect and understanding and love. it breaks my heart to see or hear about how people are bullied because of their sexual orientation or because of the lives they've decided to lead. so the message is that it gets better. it gets better because it has to.
this is not a message saying "toughen up and stop being so sensitive" as some people have said. this is a message that life is worth living, through all the shit that happens and through all the sadness. this is a message that no matter how incredibly lost and hopeless you feel, it will get better. you'll leave behind the assholes who dare condemn something you can't help or the choices you can help and choose to make. you'll find a community of people, gay or straight, who love you beyond words or actions. you'll find joy in the very thing that brought you such pain. however, it's for you to decide that you want to stick around for the good parts and i assure you that it will get better.
though i'm not gay, it doesn't matter because injustice hits all of us equally. throughout my 19 years, i've been so lucky to have amazing friends and family and yes, some of the closest people to me identify as homosexual. i love them just the same because to me, they're no different. it doesn't matter who you're attracted to or how "different" you might act because at the core, we're people and people deserve respect and understanding and love. it breaks my heart to see or hear about how people are bullied because of their sexual orientation or because of the lives they've decided to lead. so the message is that it gets better. it gets better because it has to.
this is not a message saying "toughen up and stop being so sensitive" as some people have said. this is a message that life is worth living, through all the shit that happens and through all the sadness. this is a message that no matter how incredibly lost and hopeless you feel, it will get better. you'll leave behind the assholes who dare condemn something you can't help or the choices you can help and choose to make. you'll find a community of people, gay or straight, who love you beyond words or actions. you'll find joy in the very thing that brought you such pain. however, it's for you to decide that you want to stick around for the good parts and i assure you that it will get better.
October 14, 2010
caught.
sometimes [right now] my procrastination kicks me in the ass. thus, i'm up at 3 am making a study guide for my midterm in approx. 9 hours. now i'm busying harping on how my life is so busy and full of shit that i have to struggle through.
okay, it's not. 21 hours of school doesn't feel too bad! i find it's harder for me to actually attend class but the workload isn't too intense. also, work? not intense either. i actually like my job though it's in basically a basement and i freeze to death every damn day.
anyways, if only i could stop procrastinating by watching jersey shore episodes or LOLing at arrested development or drinking too much grape juice and subsequently falling asleep on the sofa.
ugh! is it almost thanksgiving yet? i need to get my turkey on.
okay, it's not. 21 hours of school doesn't feel too bad! i find it's harder for me to actually attend class but the workload isn't too intense. also, work? not intense either. i actually like my job though it's in basically a basement and i freeze to death every damn day.
anyways, if only i could stop procrastinating by watching jersey shore episodes or LOLing at arrested development or drinking too much grape juice and subsequently falling asleep on the sofa.
ugh! is it almost thanksgiving yet? i need to get my turkey on.
October 10, 2010
grievances.
i'm not saying it's the most important thing in my life or that it's of utmost importance, but if you feel the need to say something then own up to it and do it well. esp when someone else is depending on you.
if you find you can't do it, then own up to that too! instead of stringing me along while simultaneously flirting online. so yeah, i'm putting your ass on blast assuming you can figure out who you are. please don't dickride me and everybody else, then shit on your responsbilities. if you feel the need to do that, kindly jump off my nuts and we'll be done with it.
if you find you can't do it, then own up to that too! instead of stringing me along while simultaneously flirting online. so yeah, i'm putting your ass on blast assuming you can figure out who you are. please don't dickride me and everybody else, then shit on your responsbilities. if you feel the need to do that, kindly jump off my nuts and we'll be done with it.
October 6, 2010
cupcakes.
i'm so sleepy all the time! damn my procrastination.
i feel like baking/decorating cupcakes. i have no reason to do this since i kind of dislike desserts.
i feel like baking/decorating cupcakes. i have no reason to do this since i kind of dislike desserts.
October 4, 2010
NTS.
*note to self
before going outside for the day, check weather.com or else you will freeze your nuts off and look like that dummy who wore shorts and a cardigan. whilst this might be fetching upon other girls, not so fetching upon pale legged girls with saggy backpacks. furthermore, shave ya legz.
before going outside for the day, check weather.com or else you will freeze your nuts off and look like that dummy who wore shorts and a cardigan. whilst this might be fetching upon other girls, not so fetching upon pale legged girls with saggy backpacks. furthermore, shave ya legz.
pulling a gwyneth paltrow.
in a text conversation about new names...
"Okay call me pineapple. No, papaya. I like it when you call me big papaya bahaha."
"Okay call me pineapple. No, papaya. I like it when you call me big papaya bahaha."
October 2, 2010
little things.
a lot of times, i find myself becoming gradually more negative. so i have to make a conscious effort to remind myself to stop being such a shit. while i definitely do not have everything in the world that i want, i have everything that i need. i feel like making a list so here's one of all the little things that (weirdly) have made my day lately:
-the obvious, my family.
-being able to finally wear cardigans without sweating out half my water weight.
-seeing the sunrise (or something) as i haul ass to school at 7 am.
-this walking windup pumpkin man that i got from the botanical gardens
-jersey shore thursdays.
-realizing that my car has a hook in case i ever decide to buy some truck nuts.
-the saltwater room by owl city.
-pomegranate season! i plan on spending the majority of my paycheck on them.
-new levels of angry birds.
-halloween! my favs holiday!
September 30, 2010
truck nuts.
i'm writing an anthropology paper on truck nuts and the people who buy them.
strangely, i can't make myself stay on task. if writing an essay about truck nuts isn't enough to keep my interest, what has my life come to?
strangely, i can't make myself stay on task. if writing an essay about truck nuts isn't enough to keep my interest, what has my life come to?
September 29, 2010
blurred.
everything's going really fast and things keep getting blurred and i miss the days when i fell asleep on my living room sofa, watching frasier or something equally bad.
also, i need to start wearing my glasses despite how shiny they make my forehead look.
furthermore, i'm starting to realize how easy it is to get pulled into shit!
also, i need to start wearing my glasses despite how shiny they make my forehead look.
furthermore, i'm starting to realize how easy it is to get pulled into shit!
September 26, 2010
critically indecisive.
i keep posting things! which i guess is a nice change from me forgetting i have a blog at all.
okay. so i was creepin around today, which tends to happen when i have homework out da yang and no desire to do any of it.
the weather is amazzzzzzing. it's not all gray anymore though but i guess its okay since there's sunshine out da yang! i really like that. out da yang. anyways.
sometimes i wish that i would wholeheartedly go for things that i want as opposed to sometimes begrudingly listening to my parents and/or listening to my cheap ass self. what are you being cheap about now, you may ask. i'm not being stingy about the normal things like clothing or school supplies or gas per usual. i am being cheap about school.
my senior year, i didn't even bother to apply ut. i'm not sure why, it was probably a combination of sad self confidence and the fear of being crushed by debt. thus, all freshman year i didn't really party or really get involved in any organizations. i spent most of my days/nights studying or sleeping or eating, all so i could apply ut for my sophomore year.
FINALLY, i got my acceptance letter into ut in july. however, for some questionable reasoning, i decided not to go to ut and to attend uta instead. i think the buildup of my reasoning was 1) i would graduate without debt and 2) i get to be closer to home.
okay those are actually valid reasons hahaha nvm. i take back my "questionable reasoning". howevs, sometimes (often) i wonder what if i had just gone to ut for my sophomore year. then i wouldn't have to be wondering about it all the time and i think i'd love it there. howevs, (yet again) part of my mehness comes from my parents hating the fact that i might be 4 hours away and if (god/buddha/general omnipresent powers) forbid, something were to happen to my fams, i couldn't be able to forgive myself.
people talk about the catholic guilt a lot. but really, the buddhism/slight tendency towards general religions guilt that really bites you in the ass. then again, i'm not blaming my inability to choose/decide life paths on my parents. i'm juss sayin, they are not making it any easier. also, while i'll probably end up finishing up my undergrad at uta, i could see myself living as a broke graduate in austin. we shall see.
god, this weather is making me crazier than usual.
okay. so i was creepin around today, which tends to happen when i have homework out da yang and no desire to do any of it.
the weather is amazzzzzzing. it's not all gray anymore though but i guess its okay since there's sunshine out da yang! i really like that. out da yang. anyways.
sometimes i wish that i would wholeheartedly go for things that i want as opposed to sometimes begrudingly listening to my parents and/or listening to my cheap ass self. what are you being cheap about now, you may ask. i'm not being stingy about the normal things like clothing or school supplies or gas per usual. i am being cheap about school.
my senior year, i didn't even bother to apply ut. i'm not sure why, it was probably a combination of sad self confidence and the fear of being crushed by debt. thus, all freshman year i didn't really party or really get involved in any organizations. i spent most of my days/nights studying or sleeping or eating, all so i could apply ut for my sophomore year.
FINALLY, i got my acceptance letter into ut in july. however, for some questionable reasoning, i decided not to go to ut and to attend uta instead. i think the buildup of my reasoning was 1) i would graduate without debt and 2) i get to be closer to home.
okay those are actually valid reasons hahaha nvm. i take back my "questionable reasoning". howevs, sometimes (often) i wonder what if i had just gone to ut for my sophomore year. then i wouldn't have to be wondering about it all the time and i think i'd love it there. howevs, (yet again) part of my mehness comes from my parents hating the fact that i might be 4 hours away and if (god/buddha/general omnipresent powers) forbid, something were to happen to my fams, i couldn't be able to forgive myself.
people talk about the catholic guilt a lot. but really, the buddhism/slight tendency towards general religions guilt that really bites you in the ass. then again, i'm not blaming my inability to choose/decide life paths on my parents. i'm juss sayin, they are not making it any easier. also, while i'll probably end up finishing up my undergrad at uta, i could see myself living as a broke graduate in austin. we shall see.
god, this weather is making me crazier than usual.
my grandparents are coming to visit us in november and they're staying until the new year!
*also, halloween/halloween season is coming! right now, i'm sitting by a window my mom forced me to open. a cold ass breeze is coming in and i love this weather.
best news i've heard in a really long time.
i'm obsessed with my gparents, no lie. it's hard to not be obsessed with two people who send me 10 lb boxes of tangerines and guavas. also, for most of my childhood, my gparents lived in vietnam. then they came to california but then we moved to texas. so i've only had them in my life for about 3 years altogether! so to have my gparents lounging in our living room and going to restaurants and zoos and botanical gardens with them, these all add up to the best news ever.
*also, halloween/halloween season is coming! right now, i'm sitting by a window my mom forced me to open. a cold ass breeze is coming in and i love this weather.
September 25, 2010
to self.
lately, i've been thinking seriously about my future and what's going to happen after i finish my undergrad degree. i've been wondering if i'm sure about being an anthropology major.
since my freshman year, i've taken 3 anthropology classes and am working on 3 more this semester. every single teacher in anthro has been so incredibly passionate about their careers and the material they're teaching. it's (sadly) so out of the norm for me to encounter this so it forces me to question my own decisions.
all through high school, i've rarely ever felt excited to learn something new. math, history, english and physics were just so boring to me and really just a chore. it's not because i'm awesome at them, because i am definitely not (esp math), it's just because i felt like i didn't want to sit down and read about them and feel happy about it. don't get me wrong, i had really great teachers in some of those subjects and i do like english. it just seems to have lost a sense of adventure about it, at least to me in high school. then i took art as a higher level. i realized that i love it more than anything i've ever done and that i was actually capable of working hard if it was towards something i love.
anthropology (namely with reference to gender studies) is my new love. i find myself actually wanting to learn and take as many classes as i can. that's something relatively new to me and so what if when i graduate, i will probably be broke as fuck? this is a cliche, but i'd rather be broke as fuck and doing something that i love and am so passionate about than shitting pots of money and miserable and counting down days to vacations i'll never take.
besides, mcdonald's has a value menu and i have a giant piggy bank full of pennies and old chuck e. cheese coins.
since my freshman year, i've taken 3 anthropology classes and am working on 3 more this semester. every single teacher in anthro has been so incredibly passionate about their careers and the material they're teaching. it's (sadly) so out of the norm for me to encounter this so it forces me to question my own decisions.
all through high school, i've rarely ever felt excited to learn something new. math, history, english and physics were just so boring to me and really just a chore. it's not because i'm awesome at them, because i am definitely not (esp math), it's just because i felt like i didn't want to sit down and read about them and feel happy about it. don't get me wrong, i had really great teachers in some of those subjects and i do like english. it just seems to have lost a sense of adventure about it, at least to me in high school. then i took art as a higher level. i realized that i love it more than anything i've ever done and that i was actually capable of working hard if it was towards something i love.
anthropology (namely with reference to gender studies) is my new love. i find myself actually wanting to learn and take as many classes as i can. that's something relatively new to me and so what if when i graduate, i will probably be broke as fuck? this is a cliche, but i'd rather be broke as fuck and doing something that i love and am so passionate about than shitting pots of money and miserable and counting down days to vacations i'll never take.
besides, mcdonald's has a value menu and i have a giant piggy bank full of pennies and old chuck e. cheese coins.
September 22, 2010
witch teats.
a really long time ago, i heard somebody say "it's colder than a witch's teat/tit (in a brass bra)"
i guess some people add that "brass bra" part on to give it a little flava. well, it's colder than a witch's teat in a brass bra up in this house.
i keep taking naps. this is becoming a chronic problem. i think my sickness has forced my body to conclude that it's hibernation time which is not good considering i have exams out da yang.
i've tried to make my body subsist on giant guavas i miraculously found in the fridge, pomegranates and sweet tea from chicken express. this is probably why i am sick.
i guess some people add that "brass bra" part on to give it a little flava. well, it's colder than a witch's teat in a brass bra up in this house.
i keep taking naps. this is becoming a chronic problem. i think my sickness has forced my body to conclude that it's hibernation time which is not good considering i have exams out da yang.
i've tried to make my body subsist on giant guavas i miraculously found in the fridge, pomegranates and sweet tea from chicken express. this is probably why i am sick.
September 21, 2010
September 19, 2010
this weekend, of all weekends, is the one where all my events for probably the entire month of september decided to take a giant shit on.
i've been out of my house since 6 am on friday. i make random pit stops here to nap and eat. i haven't turned on the tv once. i have 3 exams this week, 1 presentation, work and meetings. i would say that yes, i do like being busy as opposed to trying to kill time with impromptu dancing in my room or internetting. howevs, right now, there's nothing i'd rather do than lay out and go swimming and take advantage of this weather. alas, i have been hypothetically locked in my room, staring into the reflection of great weather via my $5 (slightly warped, but it was five dollas) mirror from walmart.
sometimes stress has this great effect on me where i do things! actively! but right now, i just want to take a nap which is questionable since i woke up 30 minutes ago.
i've been out of my house since 6 am on friday. i make random pit stops here to nap and eat. i haven't turned on the tv once. i have 3 exams this week, 1 presentation, work and meetings. i would say that yes, i do like being busy as opposed to trying to kill time with impromptu dancing in my room or internetting. howevs, right now, there's nothing i'd rather do than lay out and go swimming and take advantage of this weather. alas, i have been hypothetically locked in my room, staring into the reflection of great weather via my $5 (slightly warped, but it was five dollas) mirror from walmart.
sometimes stress has this great effect on me where i do things! actively! but right now, i just want to take a nap which is questionable since i woke up 30 minutes ago.
2.
it's been almost 2 weeks since i've written an entry! i'll give the cliche/vague excuse: "i've been busy."
but i have. between school/work/vsa, i barely have time to sit/complain/watch criminal minds.
also, i was talking to megan about the past and how i've learned things. pretty giving that whole "oh, yeah. it was a real shitty experience but i def learned from it" thing. i guess past mistakes can just be twisted into lessons later on. so that's what i did.
i guess what i'm really just wondering right now is the differences and boundary lines between certain things. i'm wondering if i know myself well enough to make a decision. i think i do.
then again, maybe i don't.
[i'm also considering finally getting a tattoo. but i've said this for about 3 years hahaha]
but i have. between school/work/vsa, i barely have time to sit/complain/watch criminal minds.
also, i was talking to megan about the past and how i've learned things. pretty giving that whole "oh, yeah. it was a real shitty experience but i def learned from it" thing. i guess past mistakes can just be twisted into lessons later on. so that's what i did.
i guess what i'm really just wondering right now is the differences and boundary lines between certain things. i'm wondering if i know myself well enough to make a decision. i think i do.
then again, maybe i don't.
[i'm also considering finally getting a tattoo. but i've said this for about 3 years hahaha]
September 6, 2010
ten lbs.
for a few months now, i've been on this "lose ten lbs" bender. however, i can't tear myself away from my love of food long enough to fully commit myself to this.
tomorrow i'm going to fully do this! ten lbs! not to mention toning up. i read somewhere that a lot of women spend most of their lives battling the ten pound monster. i don't want to be battling this for the rest of my life so i might as well do it now and commit to a life long love of health.
maybe i'll just work out a lot so i can eat badly.
tomorrow i'm going to fully do this! ten lbs! not to mention toning up. i read somewhere that a lot of women spend most of their lives battling the ten pound monster. i don't want to be battling this for the rest of my life so i might as well do it now and commit to a life long love of health.
maybe i'll just work out a lot so i can eat badly.
September 4, 2010
one crusty bean.
my blog background is now a giant vat of jellybeans.
i hope to send you into a sugar and artificially colored induced coma.
before all of my blog text shows up, there is one crusty ass red jellybean on the background.
i hope to send you into a sugar and artificially colored induced coma.
before all of my blog text shows up, there is one crusty ass red jellybean on the background.
September 3, 2010
complaints.
i'm a complainer. i have been since birth. eventually, i'll get up and get shit done but i will still bitch about it. i'm also always inside my head. when carrie bradshaw accused miranda hobbes of doing this, i realized that i might be a miranda hobbes.
every so often, i have really lame revelations. they go like this: "ohmygod, i've realized that i don't want to waste my life! i need to do something! i feel like i'm in a rut!" and nidhi is usually the person on the other line.
ever since i started this new blog, my old xanga has gone moldy and dusty. i feel like this is a fake blog for myself since i only choose to write about light things involving my hatred of the bachelor and how i am constantly shiny headed. while my xanga was old/shriveled/crusty/ancient, it was more real. even though everything i wrote was only about a sentence long, i felt as if it was me, the good/bad/sad/awkward.
so i don't want to be so one sided on this blog anymore. i don't want to only write about things that are light and amusing. so i won't. also, all this self doubt and feelings of inadequacy can kiss my (recently inspired by the movie, Tootsie) ass. i'll write more about this later. maybe.
August 30, 2010
hey there, sweaty faced girl.
i am a constant victim of the shiny face striker. what is that? exactly what it sounds like. in situations where people perspire (say, walking to and from class through a GIANT parking lot), i tend to get shiny faced from sweat more than what i assume is normal.
since i haven't gotten my parking sticker in the mail, i'm forced to put up a receipt every day. after walking across a giant bridge from the parking lot to campus (i estimate it's about a mile but my sweaty ass is probably exaggerating), i realized i forgot to put my sticker up! so i must trek back. then forth. i am then sweating buckets! i then sit by a cute boy while playing "We Didn't Start the Fire" by billy joel. he kept looking over and laughing and i assume it's about 1. my sweaty face or 2. he's trying to play cute with me in a strange fashion in which he is only missing a fan to play coy behind. it wasn't either of those, i just didn't realize my music was on so loud. 19 year old sweaty girl blasting billy joel? LOLZFEST.
every i.d. card picture i have, my forehead is reflecting the light from the flash. i am a living/walking/talking beacon for awkward sweaty faced kids.
*these following pictures are actually awkward themselves. though i am usually an asian girl, apparently i am black on my ids.
since i haven't gotten my parking sticker in the mail, i'm forced to put up a receipt every day. after walking across a giant bridge from the parking lot to campus (i estimate it's about a mile but my sweaty ass is probably exaggerating), i realized i forgot to put my sticker up! so i must trek back. then forth. i am then sweating buckets! i then sit by a cute boy while playing "We Didn't Start the Fire" by billy joel. he kept looking over and laughing and i assume it's about 1. my sweaty face or 2. he's trying to play cute with me in a strange fashion in which he is only missing a fan to play coy behind. it wasn't either of those, i just didn't realize my music was on so loud. 19 year old sweaty girl blasting billy joel? LOLZFEST.
August 28, 2010
bleeding love and other things leona lewis sang about.
i was just called a "bleeding heart liberal" today. thus is the title of my post. however, this is not a post about jesse mccartney written ballads which are sung by leona lewis and etc. i just liked the way it sounded ha! so i will beat this dead horse of a blog post title and use it as an overwrought theme. holla!
*the only song i have ever heard by leona lewis is "bleeding love" so i had to google other songs by her and struggled to incorporate the titles into my post. why i insist on painting myself into a love ballad corner, i'm not sure. bear with me.
"Bleeding Love": i'm not exactly sure how being a bleeding heart liberal (which i suppose means you care to"o much about certain issues?) is exactly a huge insult. i mean, isn't a huge part of the human experience (i sound like a robot) is caring about somebody/something other than yourself? and trust, politics is personal. so to be called a bleeding heart liberal is really just baffling. it's like entering a yo mama is so _____ ! contest and coming up with "yo mama is so wonderful, she shits cookies and love!
"Stone Hearts & Hand Grenades": wtf leona lewis? oh well. anyways, today is the 47th anniversay of MLK Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. Now, everybody loves Martin Luther Kings (Sr. and Jr.) right? except for like, white supremacists. So having Glenn Beck (noted general hatemonger and right wing nut) hold histeabagging tea party "restore honor to America" rally on the very same steps and the very same day, shit's gonna hit the fan. really, Glenn Beck, really? You could've done it any other day (i would still bitch about it) but on today, of all days. that is a hand grenade right into my liberal flavored stone heart.
"Dip Down" and "Chiquitita": I just liked these titles. Also, isn't "Chiquitita" an ABBA song? I tried to listen to Dip Down and only got to like, 46 seconds.
Must. End. Post. With. Good. Song.
Gifted by N.A.S.A (ft. Lykke Li, Santogold and Kanye)
*the only song i have ever heard by leona lewis is "bleeding love" so i had to google other songs by her and struggled to incorporate the titles into my post. why i insist on painting myself into a love ballad corner, i'm not sure. bear with me.
"Bleeding Love": i'm not exactly sure how being a bleeding heart liberal (which i suppose means you care to"o much about certain issues?) is exactly a huge insult. i mean, isn't a huge part of the human experience (i sound like a robot) is caring about somebody/something other than yourself? and trust, politics is personal. so to be called a bleeding heart liberal is really just baffling. it's like entering a yo mama is so _____ ! contest and coming up with "yo mama is so wonderful, she shits cookies and love!
"Stone Hearts & Hand Grenades": wtf leona lewis? oh well. anyways, today is the 47th anniversay of MLK Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. Now, everybody loves Martin Luther Kings (Sr. and Jr.) right? except for like, white supremacists. So having Glenn Beck (noted general hatemonger and right wing nut) hold his
"Dip Down" and "Chiquitita": I just liked these titles. Also, isn't "Chiquitita" an ABBA song? I tried to listen to Dip Down and only got to like, 46 seconds.
Must. End. Post. With. Good. Song.
Gifted by N.A.S.A (ft. Lykke Li, Santogold and Kanye)
August 20, 2010
i'm failing on my personal commitment to myself where i write in my blog almost every day!
there are few things lamer than not keeping your word and not keeping it to yourself is like a double whammy.
oh! oh! i finally decided to major in anthropology since the only classes i loved freshman year were my anthro classes (GENDER STUDIES FTW!)
i watched step up 3 in 3d a few days ago. i wish they would just forget the pretense of having a plot and just dance, like gaga said.
there are few things lamer than not keeping your word and not keeping it to yourself is like a double whammy.
oh! oh! i finally decided to major in anthropology since the only classes i loved freshman year were my anthro classes (GENDER STUDIES FTW!)
i watched step up 3 in 3d a few days ago. i wish they would just forget the pretense of having a plot and just dance, like gaga said.
August 8, 2010
meg cabot flavored rant.
i really love reading funny murder mystery books. you might be saying, how can a book be murder filled and be funny?
well, it mostly cannot. the books, my guilty pleasures, are cheesy as hell. they also have a weird culinary reference most of the time.
my favs are by nancy fairbanks and they center on a culinary writer who finds herself in the middle of food flavored murder scenes/crimes all the time! i guess i just love food so much that i must interject it into most aspects of my life. even those really embarrassing aspects.
anyways! when i was in middle school, girls used to read books by meg cabot all the time. so i decided to pick up a meg cabot book named "size 14 is not fat either". i only got to the second page before i couldn't handle anymore.
i'm used to really cheesy dialogue and cringing while avidly reading when i'm imbibing in these types of books but dayummmm meg cabot.
her character, former pop tart heather wells, was enduring the blistering cold blah blah blah. so she kept talking about how the grocery stores are closing up because of the cold and how there aren't any people on the street.
except drug dealers. she says "and still the drug dealers are out in full force...i guess that just goes to show that we americans still have a lot to learn from our hardworking immigrant population."
i had to keep reading this sentence over and over and i kept thinking "wait, what? is this racist? wtf ? WTF MEG CABOT, WRITER OF CHEESY TEEN NOVELS EVERYWHERE?"
and you know what, it totes is. maybe not racist per se but horribly offensive. but would it be racist? because i can assume that "immigrant population" is pointed at certain races obvi. so what meg cabot's trying to say is that americans should look up to immigrants because we're such intense drug dealers that we even work in the snow?
so i stopped reading her book. it might be perceived as a very small reason but i guess to me, i can't agree with her, however small, dig. by reading her book, i feel like i'd personally be doing just that.
well, it mostly cannot. the books, my guilty pleasures, are cheesy as hell. they also have a weird culinary reference most of the time.
my favs are by nancy fairbanks and they center on a culinary writer who finds herself in the middle of food flavored murder scenes/crimes all the time! i guess i just love food so much that i must interject it into most aspects of my life. even those really embarrassing aspects.
anyways! when i was in middle school, girls used to read books by meg cabot all the time. so i decided to pick up a meg cabot book named "size 14 is not fat either". i only got to the second page before i couldn't handle anymore.
i'm used to really cheesy dialogue and cringing while avidly reading when i'm imbibing in these types of books but dayummmm meg cabot.
her character, former pop tart heather wells, was enduring the blistering cold blah blah blah. so she kept talking about how the grocery stores are closing up because of the cold and how there aren't any people on the street.
except drug dealers. she says "and still the drug dealers are out in full force...i guess that just goes to show that we americans still have a lot to learn from our hardworking immigrant population."
i had to keep reading this sentence over and over and i kept thinking "wait, what? is this racist? wtf ? WTF MEG CABOT, WRITER OF CHEESY TEEN NOVELS EVERYWHERE?"
and you know what, it totes is. maybe not racist per se but horribly offensive. but would it be racist? because i can assume that "immigrant population" is pointed at certain races obvi. so what meg cabot's trying to say is that americans should look up to immigrants because we're such intense drug dealers that we even work in the snow?
so i stopped reading her book. it might be perceived as a very small reason but i guess to me, i can't agree with her, however small, dig. by reading her book, i feel like i'd personally be doing just that.
July 30, 2010
honesty.
i dread signing into emails, blog commenting, buying useless crap online.
why?
not because i dislike emailing, blog commenting, or useless crap! it's because of the word verification tests that check to see if i'm a mindless robot out to buy 50 cases of j. lo sized fake booty butt pads.
damned word verification aka captcha! it takes me about 10 minutes to decipher the symbols and after about 30 tries. it's a hidden shame.
damn you, captcha. you did me dirty.
why?
not because i dislike emailing, blog commenting, or useless crap! it's because of the word verification tests that check to see if i'm a mindless robot out to buy 50 cases of j. lo sized fake booty butt pads.
damned word verification aka captcha! it takes me about 10 minutes to decipher the symbols and after about 30 tries. it's a hidden shame.
damn you, captcha. you did me dirty.
July 29, 2010
current obsessions:
1. kate lanphear
for a while now, i'll read/creep anything relating to lanphear, the senior style director of elle. she has an online cult following because (reverting to my 8th grade self) she's just REALLY COOL. i joined her fb fan page.
2. frozen yogurt
i'm not sure what it is about frozen strawberry+banana yogurt topped with more strawberries and blueberries but i'm in love. i think it all started with the pinkberry theme song becky and i used to sing in our dorm room late at night. "sorry ice cream, i'm dreamin of a different dessert..."
3. blindingly bright nail polishes
what can i say? i love to unleash my inner flamboyance while simultaneously blinding passerbys and acquaintances.
4. my double chin
it's like a muffin top smuggled under my chin. i will refer to my DC as a muffin smuggler from now on. it is the cousin of the raisin smuggler but 20x more durrrty.
5. reinventions
of self, of surroundings. everything! but will i actually do any of it? meh. creepiest picture ever, btw.
July 27, 2010
SUMmer.
this has been my laziest summer ever. i didn't take classes and i didn't work unless you count frequenting grocery stores and yogurt places as work. i don't either.
some things i have done so far this summer:
1. eaten too much frozen yogurt.
2. bought a 10 class pass to yoga and went exactly once.
3. decided on my major(s).
4. been to starbucks too often to wallow in misery with megan.
5. seen two shooting stars while wallowing in misery with megan.
6. made up my very own song about ingrown toenails.
7. got covertly stuck inside a giant playground dome.
8. grew giant sunflowers(!!!).
9. raced around suburban streets in my wee honda.
10. watched season 1 and 2 of real housewives of new york. soon followed by lamenting over waste of time.
some things i want to have done by the end of the summer:
1. kayak! i want to do this every summer until i die (preferably in a kayak).
2. extreme hiking and hopefully not finding a dead body like in an episode of csi (things are getting taking a morbid turn).
3. find pyramid studded jewelry to feed my new pyramid studded jewelry love.
4. dance in beach sand.
5. go somewhere new new new.
6. cut my hair shorter than its ever been.
7. dance my ass off (with or without beach sand).
8. find a pair of skinny black pants that are a) flattering and b) not destined to make my bottom half look like a lumpy snickers bar with muffin tops and a saggy ass diaper to boot.
9. watch a movie/read a book that makes me rethink everything (in a positive manner).
10. do something bold.
some things i have done so far this summer:
1. eaten too much frozen yogurt.
2. bought a 10 class pass to yoga and went exactly once.
3. decided on my major(s).
4. been to starbucks too often to wallow in misery with megan.
5. seen two shooting stars while wallowing in misery with megan.
6. made up my very own song about ingrown toenails.
7. got covertly stuck inside a giant playground dome.
8. grew giant sunflowers(!!!).
9. raced around suburban streets in my wee honda.
10. watched season 1 and 2 of real housewives of new york. soon followed by lamenting over waste of time.
some things i want to have done by the end of the summer:
1. kayak! i want to do this every summer until i die (preferably in a kayak).
2. extreme hiking and hopefully not finding a dead body like in an episode of csi (things are getting taking a morbid turn).
3. find pyramid studded jewelry to feed my new pyramid studded jewelry love.
4. dance in beach sand.
5. go somewhere new new new.
6. cut my hair shorter than its ever been.
7. dance my ass off (with or without beach sand).
8. find a pair of skinny black pants that are a) flattering and b) not destined to make my bottom half look like a lumpy snickers bar with muffin tops and a saggy ass diaper to boot.
9. watch a movie/read a book that makes me rethink everything (in a positive manner).
10. do something bold.
July 19, 2010
Being That Girl: The Femi-Bitch Edition
I wake up generally early. Doing so, I turn on the tv at around 10 am and start watching The Doctors due to lack of cable and morning awareness. The premise of the show is to have four doctors from four different specialties who give medical advice via tv. The most outspoken doctor is a hot little thang named Dr. Travis Stork, who is the very epitome of the "I Want to Marry a Doctor" fantasy. Here he is.
However, once Doctor Douche started to speak, all of his doctorsexy went flying out of the proverbial window. He has a strange frat boy twang and usually makes awkward jokes at the expense of poop and ovaries and has smugface! grunt. Worst of all, he portrays himself as an expert on women, relationships and what we're doing wrong.
So Dr. Douche has a book out called "Don't Be That Girl: A Guide to Finding the Confident, Rational Girl Within". In it, he tells women to not expect to see the man you're dating on fridays/saturdays for the first few months. Also, don't expect to be given a drawer at his apartment and don't demand it either. What else? get the ring in 18 months or leave the guy!
Here's where my femibitch kicks in. This guy was on The Bachelor. You know, the show where one guy dates 25 women at once and the women shit themselves for a chance to be given a rose. Dr. Douche stated he went on The Bachelor to find a wife, marry, and have a perfect life. All within the compressed time capsule that is The Bachelor's set in a romantic place with 25 beautiful women all vying to play doctor with him.
How is it that he can make out with multiple women who catfight in the house all day and then claim he's so in love with yet again, multiple women? He was on a show that not only pits women against each other but puts the man in such a position as to have his pick of the litter. Then he goes on to write a book basically telling ladies to not do what was seen on the very show that gave him his initial fame.
In the end, everybody has a sense of what they should and should not do. I can't tell you what will bring a man around and what will repel him like last week's dirty diapers because who am I to say that? But being happy with who you are and where you are is always good advice. Also, even if the men don't come flocking around, shit. At least you're still happy.
However, once Doctor Douche started to speak, all of his doctorsexy went flying out of the proverbial window. He has a strange frat boy twang and usually makes awkward jokes at the expense of poop and ovaries and has smugface! grunt. Worst of all, he portrays himself as an expert on women, relationships and what we're doing wrong.
So Dr. Douche has a book out called "Don't Be That Girl: A Guide to Finding the Confident, Rational Girl Within". In it, he tells women to not expect to see the man you're dating on fridays/saturdays for the first few months. Also, don't expect to be given a drawer at his apartment and don't demand it either. What else? get the ring in 18 months or leave the guy!
Here's where my femibitch kicks in. This guy was on The Bachelor. You know, the show where one guy dates 25 women at once and the women shit themselves for a chance to be given a rose. Dr. Douche stated he went on The Bachelor to find a wife, marry, and have a perfect life. All within the compressed time capsule that is The Bachelor's set in a romantic place with 25 beautiful women all vying to play doctor with him.
How is it that he can make out with multiple women who catfight in the house all day and then claim he's so in love with yet again, multiple women? He was on a show that not only pits women against each other but puts the man in such a position as to have his pick of the litter. Then he goes on to write a book basically telling ladies to not do what was seen on the very show that gave him his initial fame.
In the end, everybody has a sense of what they should and should not do. I can't tell you what will bring a man around and what will repel him like last week's dirty diapers because who am I to say that? But being happy with who you are and where you are is always good advice. Also, even if the men don't come flocking around, shit. At least you're still happy.
July 13, 2010
boom! i got your virginity.
said i to my new blogspot.
after give and take 6 years of being in a dedicated blog relationship with xanga, i have decided to move on.
given that i was not the most attentive lover to my xanga, only posting every few weeks hurr and thurr, i will try to be a better internet addict and write/love/sum up my questionable summer days more often.
so i ran on the treadmill today. i don't ever exercise other than walking around a mall/to class/to the fridge so it was hell. pure hell. i would have started crying if i didn't sweat all the moisture out of my body from that half a mile.
now i'm thinking about people who look like prunes.
after give and take 6 years of being in a dedicated blog relationship with xanga, i have decided to move on.
given that i was not the most attentive lover to my xanga, only posting every few weeks hurr and thurr, i will try to be a better internet addict and write/love/sum up my questionable summer days more often.
so i ran on the treadmill today. i don't ever exercise other than walking around a mall/to class/to the fridge so it was hell. pure hell. i would have started crying if i didn't sweat all the moisture out of my body from that half a mile.
now i'm thinking about people who look like prunes.
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